Exclusive Interview: Pop Culturalist Chats with Emily Weisband

Emily Weisband has emerged as one of the most prolific songwriters of her generation. She’s penned hits for everyone including Camila Cabello, Dan + Shay, BTS with Halsey, and Keith Urban, and was recognized by the Recording Academy with a Grammy.

While she always imagined her path to music as a songwriter, Emily is embarking on an exciting new chapter in her career as her own artist.

Today, she releases her brand new EP, Not Afraid to Say Goodbye, and we were lucky enough to chat with her about the release!

PC: How did you discover your passion for music?
Emily: I joke around with my dad about how much I talk about him, but I’m a daddy’s girl. I am one of six kids and my dad loves music; he was a musician himself. He was in a lot of bands growing up, so music was my way of bonding with him. When I was nine, he bought a bunch of instruments for our family because they are so many of us. [laughs] He had this dream of starting a family band. Nobody really picked up any of the instruments except for me because I wanted to bond with him. I asked him to teach me some chords and he did.

Then, he would write songs around the house, so I wrote one. One day, he heard it and cried. I loved that feeling of moving somebody that I admired so much with a song that I wrote. It started out as a bonding thing, but it quickly turned into a passion and a fire for me. Now it’s in my bones. I don’t know what I would do if I wasn’t doing music…it’s the only thing I’m good at. [laughs]

PC: Who or what has had the biggest influence on your career?
Emily: I know that my Nashville story isn’t everybody’s. I moved to a town and at the first showcase that I played, there was a publisher who had this passion and feeling about me. He said he would take out a second mortgage for me, that’s how much he believed in me. So, I never had to go and hop around to find a company that I wanted to join; it chose me in a lot of ways. It’s so impactful having somebody who believes in you enough to take out a second mortgage on you. That’s what this guy, Rusty Gaston, did. He made a company called THiS Music, which is where I first signed on as a writer back in 2014. Now, he’s the head of Sony ATV here in Nashville. He’s always put me in the best situation to win.

Then, there’s my sister as well. She’s his right-hand girl. She of course believes in me and knows me. They always wanted to be the sh-ttiest writer in the room when they scheduled writing sessions for me. I know that sounds weird, but it’s why I grew so quickly as a writer—they were constantly putting me in situations to rise to the occasion to grow and become better. They never gave me an A when I deserved a C. They gave me a C, and that made me want the A. So, I would definitely say my sister Anna and Rusty. They had a huge impact on the way that my career went. I was very wise to take what they said to heart and listen to and trust them.

PC: You’ve said in previous interviews that you always thought your path was as a songwriter. What has that transition been like becoming your own artist?
Emily: The transition is interesting. It’s been a roller coaster. I’m going to be very transparent with you: honestly, it’s been very easy in the sense of creativity. I’ve always been a tell-all queen. I’ve never had a problem sharing too much or saying it as it is. Creatively, it was very freeing to be able to do that now, so I’m grateful for that. I’ll say on the other end of it, it’s an ego struggle for me, really. I moved to Nashville and I was a little fish in this big pond. I was growing into this bigger, healthier fish and gaining a lot of momentum in my songwriting career, which led me down this other artist path. I put a lot of pressure on myself to maintain the momentum in my artist career that I was building in my songwriting career.

I was going to go back to a little fish in the artist pond. I was going to have to build that back up. Ego wise, I had to lose that a bit, which was something that needed to be lost in my life, and I’m so grateful for it, but I had to lose that a bit. I had to get back to basics when it came to why I moved here. That was a little rough of a transition, but I’m definitely arriving to a place where the pressure’s off. If I’m not two feet in and standing in what I am and what I do, then I’m not going to enjoy the ride. I might as well have fun. Music’s fun.

PC: You got a single out now. Tell us about “Out of This Car” and the inspiration behind the song.
Emily: I love this song. I got dumped on January 1st, 2020. So, 2020 has sucked for me since day one. [laughs] I should have known this year was going to be nuts based off of my first night. We only dated for four months, but we were good friends before we dated. About month three, I made the decision to start opening up and being vulnerable. I think I held it out at arms-length. I reached this moment where I was like, “If I don’t actually open up, I’m never going to know. I’m never going to know what this could be.” It wasn’t exactly the best reward for my newfound vulnerability, [laughs] but a few days later, I flew to LA. I was writing with my friend Laura Veltz and my friends, the Futuristics, and I was telling them about my breakup.

I was honestly heartbroken. I was angry and I was confused as to why this was what it was. I was telling them that in most breakups, I’ll fight, or I’ll get drunk and call them a week later and try to remind them that I’m awesome and make them want me back and stuff. This time, I was like, “You know what? Him not being sure of me is enough for me to know that I deserve more than that. Go ahead. You can leave. I can’t control you, but I can control me. I’m not going to sit around and ask why for the next six months. I’m going to ask myself, ‘What now?’ I’m going to get out of this car and I’m moving on. So, I hope you know what you’re doing because you’re doing this, not me. I don’t want this.”

It was this beautiful moment for me—acknowledging the pain but also choosing to do something with it that was going to help me rather than cuddle him and what he was doing. I mean that with all respect and love for him. I loved him and he hurt me. That’s why I had to walk away in the way that I did; I wasn’t interested in chipping away at myself for the next six months. Instead, I decided to love myself in that moment. I decided to get out of the car and go inside and hug some people who I knew did love me and were sure about me. It was this really beautiful, empowering moment for me. It was different for me. I loved experiencing the change to put that into a song.

PC: The single comes off of your new EP, Not Afraid to Say Goodbye. What can fans expect with this next body of work?
Emily: I’ve stepped into a time in my life where I see saying “no” as an empowering, beautiful thing. I also see letting go of things that aren’t good for me as an empowering, beautiful thing, instead of me being mean or hurting other people or holding onto something for way too long out of fear that something better isn’t going to come along. I have a very poor track record of staying way past the time to leave or holding on way past the time to let go. I’m walking into this new empowered phase of my life thinking it’s not a man-hating phase, it’s an “I know me and I control me” phase. I can’t control you; you can be who you are and do what you do, but I know what’s right and wrong for me. I’m going to walk in that and I’m going to see it as a beautiful, loving thing rather than a hateful man-hating thing because I freaking love boys. I’m back together with the guy from “Out of this Car.” [laughs] He’s a really great sport about it. He actually let me use his car. I asked him to pull the car he dumped me in up to the side of my house, where he dumped me. That’s where I took the single art picture.

He was the one who was like, “We might as well tell the story. We might as well use life to help other people heal in the moments when they need it.” Not Afraid to Say Goodbye is permission to let go of things that don’t need to be held onto. It’s not like I set out to make the project with that title in mind. As I listened to these songs over and over again, I was like, “What’s the same here?” It was like an I Spy game. It was like, “What do all these songs have in common?” The answer was that there was this sense of being okay with saying goodbye—that doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt and that it’s easy, but it’s the choice. It’s my decision. That’s what people can expect. That’s what people can expect.

PC: If you had to select one song off of Not Afraid to Say Goodbye that best encompasses who you are as an artist, which would it be and why?
Emily: One hundred percent, it’s a song on the project called “The Way I Say Goodbye.” It’s my favorite song that I have scheduled to come out. I wrote it a few months after my breakup. I had processed and grown in those three months as a human. I sat down and thought about that moment again and started writing this song.

It’s a surrender song. I want to live a life that’s very open-handed and open-hearted. That’s not somewhere I’ve arrived; it’s somewhere I’m always striving to be. I’ll be eighty and still trying to do that, but “The Way I Say Goodbye” is my surrender song. The lyrics say, “I did everything I could. I gave it my all. If that wasn’t enough then okay. I hope that if you didn’t feel the way I loved you in the way I was with you, then I hope you feel the way I love you in the way that I let go of you.”

For me, it’s definitely the banner over what I want my life to be. I want to hold on when I need to hold on and let go when I need to let go. I see both of those things as a form of surrender. I don’t want to be too in control of my life because Lord knows that would be a total wreck and too much pressure. Who wants to be in total control?

That’s my favorite song. I’m a stayer. At the end of the day, I’m a stayer and I’m a lover, so that song honors my heart to stay. I think that sometimes with female empowerment songs, it can put the world in very black and white terms. It’s like, “I’m either obsessed with you or I hate you,” or “men suck,” or “I’m obsessed with boys.” From a female point of view, a lot of female empowerment ends up being man-hating and alone. It’s empowering to be alone or to do things with no one holding you back, but there’s this thing in me and so many women that want to stay, love, and fight ‘til the end and do as much as we can do to hold onto the people that we love. I love this song because it acknowledges that side of me and of us. I also care about myself in that song. I care about that person in the best way that I know how to, which is sometimes to say goodbye to them and not be afraid of having to do that.

Pop Culturalist Speed Round

PC: A band or artist that fans would be surprised to learn is on your playlist?
Emily: All Time Low.

PC: First album you bought?
Emily: Maroon 5’s Songs About Jane. That was my first one. I didn’t even buy it, honestly. I got it for Christmas one year, but it was the first album I ever owned, and I was stoked. I actually vividly remember receiving that on Christmas morning.

PC: First concert you attended?
Emily: I attended some little concerts growing up, but the first big concert that I remember going to was Coldplay—the Viva La Vida tour. I was fifteen.

PC: An album that changed your life and why?
Emily: I would say Joni Mitchell’s Blue. That was a big one for me. You can hear it in some of my melodies sometimes, but she had such a no rules way of writing. She fit as many words into a single sentence as she could if she wanted to. She had no rules when it came to her melodies, and she spoke frankly and did what she wanted. I love that freedom when it comes to music. That record did a lot for me as far as giving me permission to write with no rules as well.

PC: A venue on your bucket list to perform at?
Emily: Red Rocks.

PC: A must-have on the road?
Emily: I haven’t been on the road much, but melatonin. I love popping one of those in and letting the bus sing me to sleep.

To keep up with Emily, follow her on Twitter and Instagram. Pick up or stream Not Afraid to Say Goodbye today.

Photo Credit: Joelle Grace