Younger Recap 2.4: The Empiriconda

This episode of Younger starts off with a bang! Maggie and Lauren have a bedroom scene! We finally see Maggie and Lauren together (Debi Mazur looks good) instead of just them as a side plotline for a minute or so in an episode. Lauren is super into Maggie, but Maggie is playing hard to get. She tells Lauren, “You need to learn to protect your heart.” C’mon, Maggie. Let a gal in! Later in the episode, Maggie and Liza talk about past hurtful relationships because Maggie has a secret stalker facebook account to look at ex’s (Yes, girl. We’ve all been there).

Yet another 25 year old is the hot new thing: Jade Winslow, a potential new author for Millenial. Naturally, the back-and-forth between Jade and Diana at the initial meeting is on point (Jade: “These lips and these lips are sealed.” Diana: “That is quite a vagina monologue.”). Although, after listening to Jade talk about her expose on the fashion industry, I don’t know why Kelsey still wants this book (party girl seems like a recipe for disaster, if you ask me).

Then something unexpected happens: Charles’s penis-gate. Liza must handle it with care (wink, wink) so she naturally turns to internet-saavy Lauren to help her get the picture of Charles off the internet.

Kelsey and Liza still chase after the Jade Winslow book.Trying to be cool, fun, party girls, though, Liza and Kelsey drag Thad and Josh out to drink with Jade and her hairy hipster “lumbersexual” (who she dumps quickly when she’s done making out). This seems like the worst work meeting ever (Before meeting up with them, Jade’s agent tells Kelsey that in Jade’s words, “You might be a little basic.” Red alert! Back away from this client, Kelsey.). Then, Jade surprises us by talking about how terrible the fashion industry is and how awful it is for women (the photoshopping, the fakeness, etc). Whoa, moment of intelligence. Another (not-so-good) surprise: Jade throws a drink in Josh’s face when he arrives (how do you say….bitter ex-lover?) making Millenial’s potential book deal…nada. Liza, however, has another great idea. She makes Josh apologize to Jade and, ta da, they get the book.

In the midst of celebrating at the Oprah Award luncheon, though, Jade retweets the Empiriconda photo (true to her crazy and still vindictive form) along with the book deal news right before Charles accepts his Oprah Award. Sign of an out-of-control author and future problems to be solved? Yes. We’re looking forward to seeing what happens next.

Highlights and favorite lines:

• Diana to Liza on making an appointment for Diana so she can be prepared for presenting the Oprah Award to Charles by getting waxed:

Diana: “North Pole, South Pole and…equator.”

Liza: “What about the panama canal?”

Diana: “I’m not a porn star, Liza!”

• When Diana and Liza see Charles’s Empiriconda and then have to talk to him about it:

Charles: “There is a small matter that I need to talk to you about.”

Diana (talking over Charles): “We know–”

Liza (at the same time as Diana): “We’ve seen it–”

Diana (at the same time as Liza): “Not small….We will get it off–”

Diana & Liza: “Down!!”

• Maggie’s wonderful life lessons this episode. For instance, “She was just one of those people who was afraid to live the life she wanted to live.” (#Preach) and “Everyone’s got to be someone’s monster.” (Whoa. I’ve never thought about that before.)
• After Jade throws a drink at Josh: “Babe. I don’t think you’re getting that book.” -Astute observation, Thad.
• Josh explaining what happened between Jade and him…and how Jade is crazy and wouldn’t leave him alone:

Josh: “She kept climbing up my fire escape.”

Liza: “Wait. Is that butt stuff?!”

Josh: “No! She was literally climbing up my fire escape.”

• “Yow owe me so many fire escapes.” Yes, Josh, she does.

Photo Credit: TV Land